How Savage X Fenty transformed my view on the male gaze.

Let’s call him…Jake. 

For about six months or so, Jake became the luckiest man in the world. Why? Well, he was dating me of course. 

It was the dark side of the pandemic and I found myself entangled in a new relationship with a man who was eager to waste my time. Like many of us girls, who spent their childhoods watching Disney channel and chick flicks, I was quickly infatuated by the idea of him. So there wasn’t a moment that I would let go by without showing him how wife-able I was. 

Home-cooked meals, lingerie, making friends with his friends. I nauseate at the memory of all the effort I made for the undeserving. That season of my life was a battle between choosing myself or male approval. You’ll be surprised how many women pick the latter.

For as long as I can remember, I’ve been a consumer of all things frills, fun, and hyper-feminine. From my Bratz dolls to the catalogues of Victoria’s Secret, I always found myself ooing and aaring at the goddess-like imagery of women in skimpy clothes or lingerie. 

Between 2009 and 2017, the Victoria Secret Fashion Show meant to me, what the Euro Cup means to the entirety of the British public. Little did I know at the time, that with every click of the button or flip of the page, I was consuming the very deliberate marketing of a brand dedicated to creating lingerie strictly for the male gaze. 

The brand of ‘Victoria Secret’ had become an initiation of ‘womanhood’ and I had fooled myself into thinking that every time I forked out £70 for a lingerie set, I was empowering myself. The reality was that I was adorning myself in silk and lace because I believed that it would amplify the level of desirability men had for me. 

Even though this particular mindset makes me cringe today, it wasn’t until the premiere of the Savage X Fenty Show in 2018 that my mindset began to change. You already know all the buzzwords (diverse, representative, body-positive) Savage X did it all and they did it well. At 20 years old, my mind was blown and I switched my VS membership for a Savage one. My relationship with lingerie was about to change forever. 

Through Savage X, I have learned that lingerie doesn’t have to be a secret that is only reserved for that special guy. Savage X Lingerie has everything to do with who you are and want to be in the moment. It expresses all of the intimate facets of what it is to be a woman. It is proud of its femininity and transcends the idea of what it is to be a woman. Sometimes when I’m feeling a little doubtful about myself as a sensual being, it’s the Savage X Fenty Show that I return to for motivation and inspiration. 

This brings me back to good ol’ Jake. It was finally the end of our tumultuous affair and the infatuation bubble had finally popped. I stood at my door and watched as he repeated the same old pattern of empty promises and apologies and words that would usually make me melt was quickly followed with, ‘so, can I come in?’. I almost said yes. My dumb ass, nearly said yes! 

But little did he know, a few hours before his arrival on my doorstep I had received a special delivery. In my living room was a box of goodies from Savage X Fenty’s summer collection. I thought about how excited I was to recieve the package, how I lifted all the pieces up to my body and saw the woman I wanted to be in them. It was the kind of woman that this boy did not deserve to see in her Savage X. So it was goodbye Jake and hello Savage X Fenty and three months later, I am certain I made the right choice. 

This year, the Savage X Fenty Show by Rihanna returns to Amazon Prime for its third edition of the annual lingerie presentation, set to stream on September 24. The game-changing fashion show incorporates live music, diverse casting, and interactive elements that have made the annual showcase a highlight of the fashion calendar. If I could predict anything about this year’s show, it’s that Savage X Fenty Show will raise the bar once again. 

Watch this space for updates & my review on the show.

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