“It was sunny, and we were sexy . The perfect recipe for a sensational time” – DLT Malta 2023 Review

Wow, wow, wow! Good morning DLT 2023 Islanders!

How are we all feeling? Holiday blues settled in yet? Still going through your photo memories and uploading posts titled ‘take me back’? *sigh, aren’t we all

DLT 2023 was truly special, both for our seasoned brunchers, and newcomers alike. Topping last year’s vibes seemed like an impossible feat, however, this year’s island getaway was truly a testament to the fact that wherever there’s sun, music, and opportunities to be sexy – we finna have a beautiful time.

That being said I’m back with another review recapping all the best bits from the trip, and truly I’m just wondering where to start. Maybe the beginning? (Y’all know I love a ‘the-process-is-the-prize’ sob story.)

In the beginning

The dates dropped end of January and truly that’s when you people should have booked your flights. However, once again I know the majority of you lacked and ended up doing a Europe tour, spending over £300 to stop over twice for what should be a 3-hour direct journey. I said it now, and I’ll say it again. As soon as the 2024 dates are released, BOOK YOUR FLIGHTS and annual leave. You can convince yourself as much as you like that this is your last year, however, we all know that next year we’ll see you in Cafe Del Mar shaking bum bum once again.

Shortly after the tickets dropped the usual discourse reared its head again – the price. We all know there’s a cost of living crisis, but don’t let that cause a cost of enjoyment crisis. For those of us who attended… in the words of my good brother Black Sherif ‘Of course, I paid it! Who paid and regretted it, hands in the air! NO HANDS?!’ Those of us now been inducted into the DLT Malta Hall of Fame, you know damn well it’s an experience worth every single penny, and that’s before the lineup is even revealed.

However, when that line up was revealed? I’ve never used the screenshot function so much in my life. I was screenshotting so hard my phone went into emergency lockdown. Dexta Daps, SiR and Asake? All at one party? WHERE ELSE THEY DOING THAT SWAY? At this point, all the debbie doubters who said they weren’t going to come, sheepishly reentered the group chats.

With two months to go, all the girlies were in the gym, training as if their life depended on it; every day, twice a day, mornings, evenings, weekends. At some point, I even stopped posting just in case people started comparing my efforts with my final outcome. Anytime people asked me if I’m training for Malta I’d lie and say “Nah, I just wanna be healthy for myself”, when in reality I was nearly passing out every session tryna add weights to my deep squats.

Aside from the quest to tighten my abs and ‘unbig my back’ Malta prep this year was fairly smooth and organised, even the newbies seemed to have their ish together. If we’re being honest, I think it’s only fair for the 2022 Malta alumni to take all the credit for creating SO MUCH pre-malta content, sharing all our fave tips and tricks on how to prepare. We really walked so y’all could shake bum x

Anyway, I think that’s enough pre-motive talk, let’s get into the festival.

Simply put, it was sunny, and we were sexy. Like, really sexy…dangerously sexy in fact. It seemed like everyone completely understood the assignment for this trip, which if I had to describe in four words, it would be ‘Be on your zoom!’.

For everyone who arrived early in Malta, I hope you’re happy with yourselves as you got to enjoy the Day 0 party. (I wasn’t there along with half of London who arrived on the evening flight on the 31st.) However, from the snaps of everyone singing Igwe and all the warm-hearted reviews, I know the vibes were special. Why won’t they be? We’ve escaped London, we made it – We are the chosen ones!

Moving on swiftly to Day 1 at Bora Bora, the first daytime event of DLT Malta is always so special as it’s the first time we really get to see everyone in their shining glory. Hosted by our musical sweethearts ‘No Signal’, the air was filled with warm embraces, surprise link-ups, and enticing eyes. I know for a fact that everyone went home after that party and re-evaluated their wardrobe for the next few days, because people did not come to play! If there were ever a place to skin out and live your wildest bad b dreams, this was it.

After the No Signal party, it was so cute to hear all the newbies asking “so what do we do now?”. My dear those rest periods between the day and evening events were for you to eat, sleep, refresh and load your next outfit for the night, and load them we did. It was around 9 pm when we all did our sexy walk into our fave wildlife park, UNO. I planned to do my sexy walk into VIP, only to humbly find out it had moved from last year’s location (those that know). However, what I love about UNO is that there are so many secret locations from which I could sing and dance along to our diverse yet stellar lineup for the night featuring the likes of AyChibs, Selecta Suave, AAA, Buttery Hotness, Dankie Sounds, DJ Spinall, Destin Conrad, SiR, and Masego.

Similar to last year, the next day was split between Moutchi’s Madness on Armier Beach and AAA’s boat party (which till this day I believe is a money laundering operation because how do tickets fly so fast). With that being said you already know which event I’m going to be reviewing, can I get a woop woop from all my fellow brokies x (haha, jk…) Next year sha, boat party is my portion, amen.

That being said, Moutchi’s Madness? Can I say, I’ve never seen such an abundance of a-bunda. Cheeks everywhere, rolling, flying, dipping, twisssing, in every direction. Shallat our honourable host Remi Burgz and our special DJ’s Buttery Hotness, Davda, DJ Laj. You see that closing set from Donch? Sensational. Me and the girls reaaaaallly had fun that afternoon. Armier Beach was a new addition to the DLT venue line up and I’ll be real the seaweed kinda threw me off a little. However, with the sun shining, all my friends looking happy and sexy? I nearly cried again guys.

At this point I have to give an honourable shout-out to all the little side missions we found ourselves on this year, whether it be drinks ups, dinners out, walks along the beach, or sneaky lin… link-ups…I mean link-ups. These moments are really what contributes to the magic of DLT Malta as they reflect our innate desire for freedom, love, and joy. I asked a few people to share some words on what they loved about DLT Malta and here’s what they had to say:

“I loved deepening relationships and friendships with people. I think it’s so easy to fall into a pattern of knowing people in one realm. However, this holiday was refreshing to just be still in the friendships I have.” – Loriane

“Honestly I’ve never ever felt so confident and stress-free. Knowing what I carry at work and how it affects how I see myself, this trip affirmed the reach of my work to people that I didn’t even know let alone seeing people I did know like YOUU!! DLT Malta reminded me that I can do both I can have the balance, I can enjoy and I am Beeeautiful🐝🥰” – Ebinehita

“Being my authentic self, whilst shaking my azzz 24/7🤸🏽‍♀️🥂❤️🇲🇹” – Bimpe

“I’ve never thought I could live so much on 2 hours of sleep every day and wouldn’t have changed it for the world 2024 we go again” – Charlotte

Ok back to the part-ival. Evening 2 saw us return to UNO for an absolutely gorgeous night curated by Mixtape Madness featuring our favourite homegrown acts such as Jay O, Tiana Major 9, and Gabzy alongside a sexy DJ lineup including the Selecta Suave, RBC, DJ P Montana, and DJ Larni, hosted by Uncle Teo. This night was definitely a personal favourite for me as I really do love a karaoke session celebrating London’s finest.

Now, for the day that needs no introduction. The final boss (even though it’s not the final day), the one and only, Cafe Del Mar. I only have a few words to say for this day, Amaria BB and Dexta Daps. *sigh. Let’s just say if you saw me, no you didn’t x

Bubbling poolside with sunset in the near distance, nothing else compares. Special shout out once again to our DJ’s Buttery Hotness, AAA, Tayo Iku, DJ Juvey, Donch, Davda and ManlikeNaija. I actually tried to leave the party twice because my feet were hurting, but each time I got to the doors, the music kept pulling me back. I was so close to taking off my shoes as it became a battle between my dignity and my enjoyment. Who won? I guess we’ll never know.

And now for the final day at Armier Beach. Can someone say Igbo and Shayo? The day was carried through with allll the vibes provided by AyChibs, AB Dollars, Halfports, Nicky Summers, DJ Laj, RBC, AAA, and Juls, hosted by our household fave, Tinyman. An incredible DJ lineup which truly added sugar, spice, and everything nice to our already sensational artist lineup featuring Focalistic, Victony, Teni and Asake. These guys are what you call party starters, energy providers, electrical conduits, an afrobeats museeeum. Have you ever been to a museum? Nah honestly, I didn’t know whether I was coming or going, running back and forth from the stage, to the bar, to the mosh pits, to the toilets, to get bottles. The night was filled with so much jubilation and joyous energy, leaving us absolutely gagging for more. So much so, the DLT team said vibes cyannn done.

Completely spoiling us, the 4-day extravaganza ended the next day with a complimentary pool party hosted once again by our absolute faves, No Signal. It was here, that the DLT team really got to let down their hair and enjoy themselves, after pulling together an absolute mammoth of an event.

I’m genuinely in love with our community. Our potential for joy is unmatched and it’s events like this that remind us of who we truly are, and with that, I pray that as we’ve all hopefully landed back safely in our hometowns, we continue to hold in our hearts the openness, happiness, and warmth that we collectively experienced and contributed to over the last few days.

You already know the vibes, to keep up to date with next year’s Malta plans make sure you subscribe here

Thank you to everyone who has made it this far in the review, wishing you a special summer season x

Love Elsie

All photos by Shane Duncan